Time To Die Again

Them ninjas didn't take any time at all, The Black Community. Not even two weeks into the year, and ninjas are slapping women and breaking into houses. Welcome back to Gainesville. You know you're in the 'Ville when you wake up to terrifying text messages about some ninjas causing mischief. It's "Time to Die" Again.

Chris "Time To Die" Rainey was arrested the other day for slapping his girlfriend. It's not the first time Rainey has put his cleat on a girl. A few years ago, he sent his girlfriend a text that it was "Time To Die" because he was upset with her. He has a special way of showing his feelings.  According to the World's Most Accurate Newspaper, The Independent Florida Alligator, Rainey went all Magic Don Juan on his lady after she went through his phone. They played a violent game of hide and seek while Rainey hid the phone in his apartment and then booked it out of the area. Rainey won. His girlfriend was about to chase him down in a car, because she's a sore loser, which was owned by Rainey's roommate. Rainey came back and yanked her out of the car, before giving her a pimpslap first. WHAP!

Homegirl should have known better. We're not saying it's okay to put a shoe on your girl because she couldn't respect a man's right to secretly text other shones, we're just saying. These Hub Heauxs be acting up and Chris Rainey don't be letting em. What he did was rude. Rainey didn't even have the courtesy to send his girl a threatening text message forewarning her before he sent the backhand to her face.

Rainey was previously getting that Pittsburg Steelers NFL money, which enabled him to live a lavish life in a Gainesville Apartment with roommates. Why is an NFL Player in Gainesville with his girlfriend? She's either a Gainesville Resident (Ewww..) or a Hub Heaux. Your guess is as good as mine. More likely, besides the fact that the Steelers had to give up the sticks on their season, that Gainesville Gushy must be good. Them #HUBHeauxs have been the downfall of many a great athlete here at UF. We need them to get our athletes excited, so to speak, and they pull bullshit like this. Then they wonder why they can't get no free Chic-Fil-A on their home turf. The Steelers then released Rainey, as did the Hub Heauxs shortly thereafter. What a shame. Pour out some Gatorade next time you're in the Venue.

Now that Rainey is unemployed, he has to start looking for some way to pay for that flamboyant Gainesville Apartment. He should really look into becoming a bouncer for The Venue, or whatever it's named this week. Slapping Local Gainesville Girls is basically the same thing he was doing before, now he gets paid for it.

As terrible as domestic violence is, his old lady should have known this was coming based off Rainey's previous record. But some girls like those kind of guys. If you like a ninja to kick you in the throat, get with Chris Rainey or a Que, as has been known to happen when they stroll. Rainey is going to have to learn that hitting a woman is not the way to deal with relationship issues. But maybe he will be lucky and his girlfriend will do a song with him in a few months. Hell, it worked for Chris Brown.